Sunday, December 31, 2006

Mantras and Memories

"You'd have to eat some celery"
"You'd have to eat some celery"
"You'd have to eat some celery," he whispered under his breath over and over again as they stood in the abandoned alley way. It was 12 am, Seg had forgotten what he and King were talking about and thus was reduced to repeating the last spoken phrase over and over until he could find a place for it. Like the mantra of some senile jigsaw puzzle addict.
"We were talking about tic tacs." King said.
"We were talking about tic tacs!" Seg recalled all of a sudden.
Tic tacs have one calorie. Celery has negative calories. In order to eat tic tacs safely, you'd have to eat some celery. Suddenly it all fit into place. Seg's face flushed with relief. The tension in his shoulders dissipated, the night could continue.

This is what Saturday night had become. The plan to goto west Philly had started its slow twisting decent into the ground after a few delays and miss-communications, and it was time to eject. KCG returned with his friend, and the four began crawling the area for hidden drinkeries. Pleasant memories of bars open long ago were met with boarded up windows and cold winds. Some hugged the walls of alleyways to keep warm, others made phone calls trying to find the next bar. Cramping their cellphones up to the ear, listening for long moments and at times replying, "No, we're here now, it's gone. There are boards over the windows."

Finally the group found a local bar, and stepped inside.
"Interesting crowd." Interesting is never a compliment.
Seg scanned the room with skeptical eyes. This was a small town bar somehow right in the middle of the city. A dumpy looking women belched lyrics into a microphone while the words ran across a nearbye monitor. "Uhhhgg, Karaoke."
KCG snatched up the song list and began scribbling titles on a piece of paper. "Where are all the drunk songs??"
The night took a delightful turn at this point. I desperately wish I could share these moments more visually. Words are so low budget.

The DJ unnecessarily butchered KCG's name and he made his way to the stage. With delivery like a lounge singer he began belting out the lyrics to "Tainted Love."
"First I ran to you, now I run to you."
Apparently, the only thing different between then and now is tense.
"Tainted love!!!! Tainted!! Love!!! Tainted Love!!"
The song was finished in dramatic fashion, with the words "Tainted Love" being expertly inserted at random and hilarious moments.
The performance ended, and the group laughed, and drank, and played pool, and lived happily ever after.

The End

(I think I wrapped that up nicely.)

- Seg

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